I would not call myself a parenting expert. I thought I had a few tricks. One of those tricks involved giving our children options so they had the appearance of control. For example, that could be as simple as picking between two different shirts for school, or as deceptive as choosing between them eating their veggies or me eating their cookies. I didn't say the choices shouldn't be obvious. But we have found that for many instances there is less fighting when we give them options.
Then it was used against us. We were walking by the park this past Saturday, when big Bounce Houses were also being set up for 4th of July festivities. Walking by meant walking through, as we weren't planning on staying. This met with disapproval from all our children, but most vocally from our 3-year old. She said, 'Mommy, you can let me play on the swings or let me play in the bounce house.'
Ummm....I guess if a 3-year old can pick up on a parenting trick, it's not all that tricky, is it? Sometimes we have to just let the children know what is going to happen and let them deal. And from a young age, my kids are getting a healthy dose of of pastor-parenting.
When it comes to decisions that involve morality, I have found myself showing them the benefits of making the right choice. Eating your supper merits dessert. Playing quietly during a meeting will get them a delayed bedtime. So often I can show them good consequences versus bad consequences. But life isn't always like that. Sometimes the consequences of a right decision will reap a neutral or negative consequence. What do we do then?
We do the right thing for the right reason.
That is a standard line that my children will have memorized as sure as they learn John 3:16. It is sort of a bottom line that I adhere to. Sure, there may be other good reasons to do the right thing as well, but in the end we should do the right thing because it is, after all, the right thing.
As I'm reading through Isaiah, I came across this memory verse from my childhood.
"But the noble man makes noble plans, and by noble deeds he stands." ~Isaiah 32:8
Life may get a whole lot more complicated than a simple one-liner, but truth remains the same. So, are you doing the right thing? Why?
Then it was used against us. We were walking by the park this past Saturday, when big Bounce Houses were also being set up for 4th of July festivities. Walking by meant walking through, as we weren't planning on staying. This met with disapproval from all our children, but most vocally from our 3-year old. She said, 'Mommy, you can let me play on the swings or let me play in the bounce house.'
Ummm....I guess if a 3-year old can pick up on a parenting trick, it's not all that tricky, is it? Sometimes we have to just let the children know what is going to happen and let them deal. And from a young age, my kids are getting a healthy dose of of pastor-parenting.
When it comes to decisions that involve morality, I have found myself showing them the benefits of making the right choice. Eating your supper merits dessert. Playing quietly during a meeting will get them a delayed bedtime. So often I can show them good consequences versus bad consequences. But life isn't always like that. Sometimes the consequences of a right decision will reap a neutral or negative consequence. What do we do then?
We do the right thing for the right reason.
That is a standard line that my children will have memorized as sure as they learn John 3:16. It is sort of a bottom line that I adhere to. Sure, there may be other good reasons to do the right thing as well, but in the end we should do the right thing because it is, after all, the right thing.
As I'm reading through Isaiah, I came across this memory verse from my childhood.
"But the noble man makes noble plans, and by noble deeds he stands." ~Isaiah 32:8
Life may get a whole lot more complicated than a simple one-liner, but truth remains the same. So, are you doing the right thing? Why?
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