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The Problem With Children's Ministry Resources (But Not Really)

I'm looking at different children's curriculum resources for our children's ministry programs. It's not a task I enjoy. I sit on my youth ministry mountain and look down and make many assumptions about the things that happen in children's ministries.

I have so very many thoughts while swimming through an ocean of options. 

First of all, why are there so many options. Are you telling me children's classes are more than some kind of juice, a box of goldfish and a song with motions? Why do we even need a book to tell us how to do this?

Should there really be crafts? If the church thinks this stuff is so important, they should invest in a hallway of refrigerators for all of this art to go on. 

Why do all the advertisements for these resources show happy adults down on the floor with puppets and glue sticks and well-behaved children? If I used their curriculum, would my classrooms be magically transformed?

Then we get to the curriculum itself. It seems to me that Adam and Eve knew something was up even before the Fall, because they are always standing behind bushes or trees. No shame? Then why aren't they running around, unhindered, in any of the pre-Fall pictures we have of them? 

And what would happen to children's resources if we didn't tell any stories involving animals for an entire quarter? We might actually have some explaining to do. 

In the end, I simply hope people realize there is room for sarcasm when it comes to my involvement with children's ministries. Otherwise, I may get some letters about this post.
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